Take No Prisoners

Canadian University Bans Bottled Water

In the latest display of misplaced enviro-consciousness in Canada, a university, a school board and the Federation of Canadian Municipalities are pushing for bans on bottled water. I know what they’re trying to do. They’re trying to get people to stop drinking bottled water because it’s horribly inefficient compared to tap or filtered water. The only problem is, now you can’t buy something healthy, like water, in a bottle, but you can still buy something unhealthy, like soda, in THE SAME BOTTLE. Does this make sense? No. Will this lead to more soda sales? Probably. Will that contribute to the obesity epidemic? Probably. Will the water from fountains suddenly stop tasting like lead-infused pool water? Probably not. And when was the last time those fountains were cleaned?

Dear Environmentally-Conscious but mathematically challenged bureaucrats,

Please stop with the eco-theatre. If you want to make a real impact, try starting with the things that create the most pollution. Start with the enormous amounts of methane produced by the livestock that satiate our meat addiction (not that meat is bad – we just eat too much of it.) Start by reducing sprawl so people don’t travel as far. Start by improving building codes so we stop building inefficient structures. Start by improving the emissions standards for all the buses and heavy construction equipment spewing diesel fumes night and day. Start with the coal- and oil-fired power plants.

And for fucksake do the math before you open your mouth.